Calendar

April 1: No fooling, the Noe Valley Farmers' Market will be handing out GROUCHO MARX GLASSES (with nose and mustache) to 100 lucky customers. 8 am-1 pm. 3861 24th St. www.noevalleyfarmersmarket.com.
April 1: Friends of Noe Valley welcomes new volunteers at "CLEAN SWEEP No. 4," starting at Noe Courts park. Tools and supplies provided. 9 am-noon. Douglass and 24th streets. 206-0231.
April 1: The fourth annual COMEDY NIGHT at 826 Valencia, "An Evening of a Thousand Scowls," features Sarah Silverman, Jimmy Kimmel, and others, to benefit student programs. Everett Middle School, 450 Church St. 642-5778.
April 1-27: Creativity Explored exhibits "VESSELS," functional items made by artists with developmental disabilities. Mon.-Fri., 10 am-3 pm; Sat., 1-6 pm. 3245 16th St. 863-2108.
April 1-29: The 51st annual POTRERO HILL ARTISTS exhibition kicks off with an opening reception April 1 from 7 to 9 pm, featuring the Apollo Jazz Group. Potrero Branch Library, 1616 20th St. 355-2822.
April 1-30: CITY GUIDES offers three walks to commemorate the 1906 Earthquake: "It Can't Happen Here," "Are We There Yet?" and "Phoenix Rising." For a schedule, call 557-4266 or visit www.sfcityguides.org.
April 2: Darrell Ubick from the California Academy of Sciences leads a SPIDER WALK in Glen Canyon Park. 10 am. For info call the Friends of Glen Canyon Park, 648-0862.
April 2: A screening of FILM Take the Lead, starring Antonio Banderas, benefits Fairmount School's new ballroom dance program. 3 pm. Kabuki Theater, 1881 Post St. 647-2822.
April 2-30: The Kadampa Buddhist Temple offers introductory BUDDHIST MEDITATION classes on Tuesdays from 7 to 8:30 pm, and Sundays from 10 to 11:30 am. 3324 17th St. 503-1187.
April 3: "Two Perspectives on Guatemala" features a discussion by public health nurse Margaret Bean and therapist Norita Vlach, author of Quetzal in Flight: Guatemalan Immigrant Families in the United States, at the ODD MONDAYS series at the Noe Valley Ministry. No-host dinner at Noe Valley Pizza, 5:30 pm; program, 7 pm. 1021 Sanchez St. jlsender@webtv.net.
April 3-28: Noe Valley SENIOR CENTER serves hot lunches for people over 60. 12:30 p.m. Noe Valley Ministry, 1021 Sanchez St. Call 648-1030 to make a reservation.
April 3-28: Chris Sequeira leads classes in TAI CHI. Mon. and Tues., 6 pm, at the Noe Valley Ministry, 1021 Sanchez St.; Wed. and Fri., 10:15 am. 773-8185 or 650-756-6857 for location.
April 4, 11, 18 & 25: The Kadampa Buddhist Temple offers weekly MEDITATION CLASSES. Tuesdays, 7-8:30 pm. 3324 17th St. 503-1187.
April 5: The Fred Cody Award will be presented to poet DIANE DI PRIMA at the Northern California Book Awards. 5-8 pm. Main Library, Latino/Hispanic Meeting Room, 100 Larkin St. 557-4400.
April 6: FILMS for preschoolers include The Day Jimmy's Boa Ate the Wash, The Dingles, and Remarkable, Riderless, Runaway Tricycle. 10:30 and 11:05 a.m. Eureka ValleyHarvey Milk Library, 3555 16th St. 355-5616.
April 6, 13, 20 & 27: The REIKI Clinic of San Francisco offers a Thursday class for new students. 7 pm. 1404 Church St. 407-4233.
April 8: Coleman Advocates for Children and Youth sponsors Speak Up for FAMILIES DAY, with kid-friendly entertainment, speeches, music by Loco Bloco, and food; the mayor and supervisors have been invited. 10 am-1 pm. Civic Center Plaza. 239-1061.
April 8: The River of Words POETRY AND ART Contest will be hosted by former Poet Laureate Robert Hass and artist Thatcher Hurd. 2 pm. Main Library, 100 Larkin St. 557-4400.
April 8: The St. Philip DINNER DANCE and Auction raises funds for education programs and facility improvements. 6:30 pm. United Irish Cultural Center, 2700 45th Ave. 824-8467.
April 8: GuyWriters presents "POETRY by Candlelight: Three Gay Poets Illuminate the Night," featuring Jim Coughenour, John Frazier, and Joel Barraquiel Tan. 7:30 pm. Magnet, 4122 18th St. 626-6098.
April 9: Rocket DOG RESCUE brings pups to 24th Street. Noon-4 pm. Zephyr Real Estate, 4040 24th St. 642-4786.
April 9: A MICROCHIPPING CLINIC is free for pets of San Francisco residents. 1-4 pm. Animal Care and Control, 1200 15th St. 822-5566.
April 9: Tom Ervin from the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender Psychotherapists Association (Gaylesta) discusses the organization at the PFLAG Support Group. 2-4 pm. St. Francis Lutheran Church, 152 Church St. 921-8850.
April 9: Nadya Tichman, associate concertmaster of the S.F. Symphony, joins pianist Roy Bogas in a RECITAL of music by Beethoven, Dvorak, and Prokofiev. 4 pm. Noe Valley Chamber Music at the Noe Valley Ministry, 1021 Sanchez St. 648-5236.
April 10: The fourth PROGRESSIVE Reading Series, to benefit progressive Congressional candidates, features Po Bronson, Peter Orner, Daniel Alarcon, ZZ Packer, and Josh Bearman, with host Stephen Elliott. 7 pm. The Makeout Room, 3225 22nd St. 647-2888.
April 10: In "Paradise Now," Mel Clay discusses the 1970s American tour of the LIVING THEATER. 7:30 pm. Bird & Beckett, 2788 Diamond St. 586-3733.
April 11: New College of California's law school offers a workshop on how to present a case in SMALL CLAIMS COURT. 6 pm. 50 Fell St. 241-1300.
April 11: Michael Helquist shows slides and discusses the 1906 relief work of Dr. Marie Equi in "Lesbian to the RESCUE." 7-8:30 pm. Eureka Valley Library, 3555 16th St. 355-5616.
April 11, 18 & 25: The Noe Valley Library's LAPSITS, for newborns through age 3, are held on Tuesdays at Bethany United Methodist Church. 10:15 am. 1268 Sanchez St. 647-8393.
April 11, 18 & 25: Librarians from the Noe Valley Library start PRESCHOOL STORY TIME, for kids 3 to 5, at 11 am. Bethany United Methodist Church, 1268 Sanchez St. 647-8393.
April 11 & 27: Doug Dowd, author of The Broken Promises of America, leads a twice-monthly class in ECONOMICS, through September. 7 pm. Modern Times Bookstore, 888 Valencia St. 282-9246.
April 13: St. Luke's Hospital offers an orientation for VOLUNTEERS, serving as patient escorts. 3-5 pm. 3555 Cesar Chavez St. 641-6538.
April 13: The Bird & Beckett POLITICAL BOOK DISCUSSION group features The Arrogance of Power: The Secret Life of Richard M. Nixon. 7:30 pm. 2788 Diamond St. 586-3733.
April 14: The Noe Valley Ministry, Temenos Catholic Worker, and S.F. Network Ministries walk the STATIONS OF THE CROSS in the Tenderloin on Good Friday. Meet on the Polk Street steps of City Hall at noon. 282-2317.
April 14: German sound artist Florian Hecker, creator of the Creatovox, and Yasunao Tone present a NOISE SYMPOSIUM. 5 pm. San Francisco Art Institute, 800 Chestnut St. 771-7020.
April 15: The Friends of Glen Canyon Park hosts an EARTH DAY CELEBRATION. Plant restoration work party starts at 9 am; hot dog barbecue at noon. RSVP 648-0862.
April 15: Author and illustrator CALEF BROWN signs his new book of poems and paintings, Flamingos on the Roof. 7 pm. Cover to Cover, 1307 Castro St. 282-8080.
April 15: The S.F. Queer Jitterbugs hosts a SWING DANCE PARTY with music by Johnny Dilks and his Country Blues Brothers. Basic line-dance lesson, 7 pm; party, 9 pm. Synergy, 1387 Valencia St. 305-8242.
April 15-17: A three-day 1906 Great EARTHQUAKE and Fire Exposition features memorabilia and safety information, 9 am-6 pm. The 1906 Expo Firefighters' Ball includes live music by Dick Bright's SRO Orchestra and a costume contest, April 15, 8 pm-midnight. Pier 48, near China Basin. 1-800-310-6563; www.1906expo.com.
April 17: Noe Valley composer/playwright KAY NOYES leads actors in a reading of her play, Sailing Septuagenarians, at the ODD MONDAYS series at the Noe Valley Ministry. No-host dinner at Noe Valley Pizza, 5:30 pm; program, 7 pm. 1021 Sanchez St.; jlsender@webtv.net.
April 17 & 18: Cartoonist DAN PIRARO'S "The Bizarro Baloney Show" introduces his 14th book, Bizarro and Other Strange Manifestations, and benefits his favorite animal welfare organizations. 8 pm. The Marsh, 1062 Valencia St. 826-5750.
April 18: Gather at LOTTA'S FOUNTAIN from 4:30 to 5:30 am to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the 1906 quake; more than a dozen survivors are expected to attend. Market Street, at Kearny and Third; www.sfrising.org.
April 18: The "Little Giant" FIRE HYDRANT, at the corner of 20th and Church streets, is repainted gold to honor its part in stopping the Great Fire in the Mission. 7-9 am. 706-7994.
April 18: The 1906 Earthquake and Fire PARADE begins 10 am at City Hall and proceeds down Market Street to Justin Herman Plaza.
April 18: Charles Fracchia gives a slide show/lecture, "EARTHQUAKE! 100 Years of Shake, Rattle, and Roll." 2-3 pm. City College, Rosenberg Library, Room 305. 239-3580.
April 18: Dennis Smith discusses the "untold story" of the 1906 quake, from his book, San Francisco Is Burning. 6-8 pm. Main Library, Koret Auditorium, 100 Larkin St. 557-4400.
April 18: Ingleside Police Station holds its regular POLICE-COMMUNITY meeting. 7 pm. Ingleside Station, 1 Sgt. John Young Lane. 404-4000.
April 19: Community Care Licensing offers a CHILDCARE LICENSING orientation, 9 to 11:30 am; and a support workshop at 12:30 pm. Children's Council, 445 Church St. 343-3333.
April 20: Melissa Houtte, co-author of Alligators, Old Mink & New Money, and Graciela Ronconi, owner of the Vendima boutique, hold an informal chat on VINTAGE CLOTHING. 7 to 8 pm. Vendima, 4100 24th Street at Castro. 285-7174.
April 20: Christine Seymour leads a DISASTER PREPAREDNESS workshop for deaf and hard-of-hearing people. 4:30-7:30 pm. Main Library, Latino/Hispanic Room, 100 Larkin St. 557-4400.
April 21: Sharon Smith signs her collection of RECIPES, Savoring San Francisco. 7 pm. Cover to Cover, 1307 Castro St. 282-8080.
April 21-23: The 18th annual West Portal Sidewalk ARTS AND CRAFTS FAIR features more than 75 exhibitors. 10 am-5 pm. West Portal Ave. near Sloat and Portola. 566-3500.
April 22: The annual meeting of Parents for PUBLIC SCHOOLS discusses the creation and maintenance of successful schools, including recommendations for the Mayor's Policy Council. 9 am-noon. Denman Middle School, 214 Oneida Ave. Register for child care at 468-7077.
April 22: Bernal Heights Preservation sponsors an EARTHQUAKE SHACK walking tour at 11 am, beginning near the top of the hill at Carver Street (near the intersection of Bernal Heights Boulevard and Bradford); an ice cream social and historical forum follow at 2 pm, at the Bernal Heights Branch Library. 500 Cortland Ave. 285-8978; www.bernalheightspreservation.org.
April 22: Learn to grow culinary and medicinal MUSHROOMS at a workshop led by Ken Litchfield of the S.F. Mycological Society. 10 am-noon. Garden for the Environment, Seventh Avenue at Lawton. 731-5627.
April 22 & 23: Alvarado School's annual RUMMAGE SALE will be open Saturday from 9 am to 3 pm, and Sunday from 9 am to 1 pm. Bring donations to the school Saturdays April 8 and 15, from 9 am to 1 pm. 625 Douglass St. 695-5695.
April 22 & 23: 1960s pop singer LESLEY GORE performs "It's My Party" and lots more, in two shows at the Brava Theater. Sat., 8 pm; Sun., 3 pm. 2781 24th St. 647-2822.
April 25: Todd Denman's "IRISH MUSIC Fun" is a participatory music program featuring pipes and pennywhistles, for children of all ages. 10:45 am. Eureka ValleyHarvey Milk Library, 3555 16th St. 355-5616.
April 25: LifeMoxie hosts "Inspiration Point," a financial/life planning seminar for women. 6:30-8:30. Spiral Muse, 3389 22nd St. 550-0667.
April 25: Eddie Epps introduces a new photo book on VISITACION VALLEY (Arcadia Publishing) at a meeting of the San Francisco History Association. 7 pm. Mission Dolores School Auditorium, 16th and Church. 750-9986.
April 25: The POLICE-COMMUNITY meeting at Mission Police Station begins at 6 p.m. 630 Valencia St. 558-5400.
April 26: Local artist and illustrator of Ghosts in the Closet, SHIRAAZ BHABHA leads an interactive art activity for ages 4 and older. 3 pm. Mission Branch Library, 300 Bartlett St. 355-2800.
April 26: Nature in the City talks continue with "Reclaiming Bay Area Military Bases," hosted by the City Lights Foundation and Counterpulse. 8 pm. 1310 Mission St. 626-2060.
April 27: The REIKI Clinic of San Francisco holds a Reiki practice night for all levels of practitioners. 7 pm. 1404 Church St. 407-4233.
April 27: UPPER NOE Neighbors meets at 7:30 pm at Upper Noe Recreation Center at Day and Sanchez streets. Call 285-0473 to confirm.
April 27: Local archivist Greg Gaar gives a slide presentation on the 1906 EARTHQUAKE. 7:30 pm. Randall Museum, 199 Museum Way. 554-9600.
April 28: Women's vocal ensemble KITKA performs "Spirit Voices" with Bulgarian folkloric soprano Tzvetanka Varimezova. 8:15 pm. Noe Valley Music Series at the Noe Valley Ministry, 1021 Sanchez St. 454-5238.
April 29: Bernal Heights Preservation sponsors a dress-up (Victorian or Edwardian) FAMILY PICNIC at two re-created earthquake shacks in Precita Park; bring food. Noon. 285-8978; www.bernalheightspreservation.org.
April 29: The S.F. Bicycle Coalition offers a class, "How to BICYCLE in S.F., and How to Fix a Flat." 1-4 pm. Main Library, Latino/Hispanic Community Meeting Room, 100 Larkin St. 431-BIKE.
April 29: City Swing Big Band presents "A DIVA'S SWAN SONG," cabaret singer Gail Wilson's farewell concert. 7:30 pm. Brava Theater. Sat., 8 pm; Sun., 3 pm. 2781 24th St. 510-535-1045.
April 30 & May 2: The Golden Gate MEN'S CHORUS premieres Memento Mori: An AIDS Requiem, by James Adler. Sun., 4 pm; Tues., 8 pm. Mission Dolores Basilica, 3321 16th St. 621-8203.
May 1: The Noe Valley Farmers' Market provides a MAY POLE to dance around. 8 am-1 pm. 3861 24th St.; www.noevalleyfarmersmarket.com.
May 2: The Know Thyself as Soul Foundation describes Sant Mat MEDITATION, "the meditation of the inner light and sound." Bernal Heights Library, 500 Cortland Ave. 831-247-9767.
May 2: A MEMOIR READING at the Main Library features Noe Valley author Judy Vaughn, Adair Lara, and Alan Kaufman. 6-7:30 pm. Latino/Hispanic Room, 100 Larkin St. 557-4400.
May 5-7: An international cast of 23 performs Viva Concha! Rose of the Presidio, a musical composed by Noe Valley songwriter Candace Forest. Fri. and Sat., 8 pm; Sun., 3 pm. Victoria Theatre, 2961 16th St. 648-8471; victoriatheatre.org.
MAY BEE
The May 2006 issue of the Voice will blossom in the neighborhood on or around May 1, 2006. The deadline for calendar items (and your taxes) is April 15. Please note that because of space limitations, Noe Valley events take priority. Our address is Noe Valley Voice, 1021 Sanchez Street, San Francisco, CA 94114. Or you may send an e-mail to Karol at calendar@noevalleyvoice.com.